Going Down on Your Wedding Night

This story occurred in Haifa Israel.

The wedding hall was full of excited guests, and after a few drinks during the cocktail hour, everything looked even more exciting. The bride and groom, Naava and Avner were ready to go under the Chuppa to exchange vows. When the ceremony was about to start, everybody was seated, except for to the family members, and the best man that joined the bride and groom under the chuppa.

The Rabbi was reciting Hebrew blessings. He turned to the groom and said, "Repeat after me. "You are Hereby sanctified to me according to the laws of Moses and Israel..."

The groom was very nervous, and he was just about to repeat the sentence, but suddenly something very strange happened. He collapsed onto the floor of the Chuppa with a loud boom. The bride was at a loss what to do.“ Avner! Get up, what happened to you?” She looked scared and surprised as if she were thinking: Oh, did I pledge my life to an unhealthy man?
Her mother exclaimed, "I knew there was something wrong with him". "Let's just cancel everything right now". It didn’t look as if she was thinking too much about what she was actually saying. Naava! "Let’s get out of here." She added hysterically.

Many guests ran to the stage to see what happened, they were crowded around the chuppa staring down at the fainted groom.
Meanwhile people started splashing water at the groom's face, and slapping him, but he wouldn't snap out of it.

As the bandleader and emcee, I grabbed the mike, and asked the guests to return to their seats so the groom could get some air, but the guests wouldn't listen. It seemed they couldn't tear themselves away.

After a long while the groom woke up, looking dazed and confused, wondering what just happened. He looked embarrassed noticing everyone was staring at him.
I took the mike again, and asked everyone to sit down, assuring them that the groom is ok, but they wouldn’t go, as they didn’t believe that the groom was really ok.

I went to the groom who was now just getting up, and asked him to come to the mike, and reassure everyone that he was ok.
The groom walked over to the mike, still a little unsteady, and assured the crowd that he was ok, although he didn’t seem so. No sooner had he finished his sentence, when, boom, he was down again.

Someone brought a glass of water for the groom, but for some strange reason, the bride took it and drank the water. She was close to being hysterical. Several seconds after that, I saw her running out. Once again, some family members started slapping the groom, wiping his face with cold towels until he finally woke up.

The Rabbi said "Mazal Tov" and was ready to continue with the strange ceremony, but now something even stranger happened. The bride was nowhere to be found. I told the family, that I saw her running away from the stage, and many guests volunteered to look for the disappeared bride.

One of the guests came back running, saying that he tried the powder room and it was locked from the inside. All the efforts were now concentrated on opening the powder room.

The groom who felt better now, came closer and started to talk to the bride through the door. “Naava! I was just too nervous, I’m ok now,” There was no response what so ever, not even a sound of crying or any other sound.

The parents of the bride, as well as the groom, were getting nervous, what if she tried to kill herself? Nobody imagined in his wildest dream, just an hour ago, that they would be calling the bride through a locked door.

For almost 15 minutes that seemed like an eternity, family and friends and many guests were calling to the bride to come out, but there was no sound beyond this door.

Someone called the janitor who came with a bunch of keys. He was aware of the anxiety of everyone, and quickly attempted to open the locked door. Finally the door was opened, the janitor was the first to go in. There was no sound or a scream or anything happening. He just came out puzzled, and the groom rushed in followed by many guests.

The bride, laid down on a small couch, was sleeping like a baby.

It was strange to see the same scene happening again in less than half an hour, but now it was the bride who had to wake up. After few slaps and some shouting, she woke up, surprised to sea herself in such a situation. A small plastic bottle fell out of her hands.

However, everything worked out, the bride and groom were awake and were able to remain standing to the end of the ceremony, and through the rest of the evening.

Epilogue:
Later on, the bride explained that being so nervous, she took a Valium to relax, and having some wine just before that, made her fall asleep.

I never found out what was the problem with the groom, but I hear the bride and groom are still happily married, and he hasn't gone down since...neither has she.

Yosi Saffi Levy